Old Hickory

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Travel Tip #1

Should some type of birdlike transport device ever be invented, be sure to check in at least an hour before boarding such a device.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Political Strategy Tip #1

Should your Vice President oppose you on the issue of nullification, it would be wreckless not to run with a new Vice President on the '33 ticket.

Safety Tip #2

Take that throbbing in the knees to mean that a storm front is rolling in, and as a result the humidity is particularly high. On these days you should probably not leave the house without coat and cane, so as to prevent arriving at your obligations wet from inclement weather, and to avenge possible assasination attempts.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Old Hickory Gift Tip 1

It's the holidays and the time to give gifts comes again. Here are a few tips to think about when giving Old Hickory themed gifts. Most everyone has all the great books on Jackson. Don't bother giving a common man the classic Age of Jackson, or any of Remini's books. The exception to this would be father to son passing on a book to teach the future generations. I'll never forget the day my father gave me Biddle and the Bank War.

You can also never go wrong with giving swords so long as the carry the inscrpition “the elegant sword presented to me by the state of Tennessee, with the injunction that he[the person your giving it to] fail not to use it when necessary in support and protection of our glorious Union.” Steer away from all that Hermitage branded hogwash. Hermiate Chi mix and the like.

No one futhermore has recived too many portraits of Old Hickory, or Rachel, or Old Hick with Rachel.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Road to the Ovial Office Tip 1

His Grace Arthur Valerian Wellesley, 8th Duke of Wellington, while serving in the Royal Horse Guards, is certinially a not man of such military comptences as His most nobel Arthur Valerian Wellesley, 1st Duke of Wellington. Therefore should the 8th Duke of Wellington take up arms against the parish of New Orlens and by extension the United States of America, take up arms in the milita and distinguish your self in battle. There is no surer a way to our nations higest office than to be the Hero of the Second Battle of New Orlens.

OKH Pet Buying Tip #1

Parrots make very good pets, although they do cause the occasional ruckus, particularly at viewings. Tigers, however, may not be the most family-friendly pets. Old Kinderhook got himself into some trouble when he accepted two tiger cubs from the Sultan of Oman. Congress declared the gifts to be for the people and not for the President, and ordered the cubs be taken to the National Zoo. Taking away pets is very damaging for children, although sometimes necessary, if by Congressional order.

OHK Safety Tip 1

When iniviting your supports to join in a march with you to the White House. It is best to have a window to climb out of and escape, least your new home become overcrowed with people celebrating the dawing of the age of the common man.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Rejoice Friends

Frontiersman, Federalist Democrats, and Yeomen rejoice, Old Hickory lives on in this very blog.

Never can I recall such a joyous a day as this save March 4 of '29, the day of Old Hickory's inaugural. This blog shall prove Old Hickory lives on.

As Jackson stated of the common voters that put him into Office, "While the magnitude of their interests convinces me that no thanks can be adequate to the honor they have conferred, it admonishes me that the best return I can make is the zealous dedication of my humble abilities to their service and their good."

And to you Old Hickory no thanks can be adequate to you for your service to this nation.